“Just One…”

For the last week, I’ve spent a lot of time making bottles, changing diapers and soothing cries.  We got placement #2 last Monday; a 4 1/2 week old baby girl. She was precious, beautiful and full of  smiles. Today, she went to live with someone else. It’s family and it’s a great situation. Great. But that didn’t stop the tears from falling as we put her in the caseworker’s van and kissed her dimpled cheeks goodbye.

Since Joanna and I started this process, I’ve often wondered if it’s possible for us to make a difference. When our placements don’t stay for more than a week, when we only get 2 placements in six months, how do we make any difference at all? The need is so overwhelming, how can we make a difference? For my birthday, Joanna got me a book. That’s no surprise to anyone who knows either of us but I’ve been waiting for this particular book to come out for awhile. It’s called “Kisses from Katie” and it’s about a 19 year old girl. This girl decided to take a year off between high school and college to teach kindergarten in Uganda. The things God did in her life during that year and the three years since has turned her world upside down. As I snuggled that precious girl and read this afternoon, I came across this statement:

“Many days, I am still overwhelmed by the magnitude of the need and number of people who need help.  Many days I see the destitute, disease-ridden children lining the streets in the communities I serve and I want to scoop up every single one of them, take them home with me, and feed and clothe and love them. Then I look at the life of my Savior, who stopped for one. So I keep stopping and loving one person at a time. Because this is my call as a Christian. I can only do what one woman can do, but I will do what I can.”

People keep telling us that, to be foster parents we must be sacrificial, selfless or strong. But I’m not any of those things. I wasn’t strong as the tears rolled down my face when the van door closed. I wanted more sleep because I was tired. I was selfish as I packed little clothes and thought that it wasn’t fair, we’d only loved her for a week, we should get more time.

But then I realized what Katie meant. This is what we’ve been called to do.

We have been called to love one at a time, just as Christ loved one at a time. From children to lepers, from the woman at the well to each of the disciples, He loved each wholly and individually. I can’t save the world and that’s not my job. That is what Jesus is for. But I can love one child at a time. One little life after another. It won’t be easy and I should probably buy stock in Kleenex but it’s what I’ve been asked to do.

And I will do what I can to love them just one at a time.